


Can You Feel It?

by prdsdefsus



Category: GOT7
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, sungjin day6 is like here for a sec
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-02
Updated: 2018-06-02
Packaged: 2019-05-17 06:52:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14827484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prdsdefsus/pseuds/prdsdefsus
Summary: Jaebeom was born without emotions, so he starts a donation box where people could donate their unwanted emotions.





	Can You Feel It?

**Author's Note:**

> so i wrote this story based on [this](https://www.facebook.com/writingprompts.t/posts/1952736175046993) and yeah i wrote it at 3 am so sorry if it's not really satisfy you ashfjfjgjjg, oh as usual, this is unbeta'd!!

People would say that living in this world is the biggest blessing ever because you could express yourself with various emotions, such as crying because your friends just threw a surprise party for your birthday, or like getting angry because your sibling ate your cake that you’ve hide inside the fridge, and so on.

 

But Jaebeom somehow manages he can’t really call it a blessing. He prefers to call it as a torture.

 

Jaebeom was born without emotions, he can’t feel anything. At first he didn’t get bothered at all, but as time passes by, he feels kind of curious when he sees people be happy, especially when they smile. Jaebeom tried to smile infront of his small mirror in his room for several times, but he felt nothing. He once asked Sungjin–his friend–how does it feel being such a normal human being with emotions and Sungjin responded, “It’s overwhelming, though sometimes it feels horrible too, I don’t really know how to say it, to be honest.”

 

Jaebeom decided that wasn’t really helping, so he’s trying to start a donation box where people could donate their unwanted emotions.

 

.

 

It’s the first day and Jaebeom feels terrible.

His tears can’t stop flowing, his whole body is trembling, lips slightly apart as he mumbles some useless curses. Jaebeom wants to fucking rip all his hair until he gets bald. He soon realizes the three balls of emotion that he just gulped earlier are named ‘sadness’, ‘fear’, and ‘anger’.

The dark room that he occupies right now seems darker, making his heart to swell even further, tears falling every milisecond, he can’t breathe properly; as if there is a pair of hands are trying to choke him to the death. Jaebeom lets himself fall on to the soft rug that he has been sitting on, curling himself while sobbing. The fact that the rain slowly falls one by one doesn’t help him to feel better, he feels more miserable. Jabeom hugs his knees quietly, slowly thinking that his life might starts falling apart like every drop of the rain he’s seeing right now through the almost-broken window, once it hits the hard surface, it’s destroyed—and gone.

 

Jaebeom stares at the ceiling. The ceiling is plain, and Jaebeom is thinking that he was no different with the lame ceiling; both of them have nothing, he kind of wishes that he should’ve not done the whole donation box thing, but he is just a human afterall—he can’t do anything except for accepting the fate, and let God do everything, controlling him like a puppet in this tiny world.

 

Jaebeom breathes out, tears still streaming as he gasps, doing his best to get more air. His legs are getting numb, yet he holds them tighter. Jaebeom remembers, when his mom was debating with his father, he couldn’t feel anything, he didn’t understand what made his mom crying at that time. But now, he understands it.

 

Fear is hovering Jaebeom’s body, and he doesn’t know what to do.

 

.

 

It’s been one month and Jaebeom looks like he’s about to die, he keeps getting the same ball of emotions as before, maybe it’s pretty different since someone gave him this one another kind of emotion called ‘disgust’—which it kills Jaebeom more, he wants to puke every time he realizes how pathetic he is. Jaebeom thinks, humans are so selfish—no one is willing to give him any positive emotion, and he feels there’s a fire pit inside his stomach; burning inside him.

 

Jaebeom takes his phone, checking today’s temperature. The screen tells him that today is going to be colder than the days before, so he gets himself a coat and starts going outside while bringing the small box. Once he sits on the usual spot, he ignores the weird gazes that is thrown by the people passing by.

 

Jaebeom isn’t surprised when he notices people are giving him the same balls. He gets sad once he remembers that he can’t take out the emotions like what most people can do—because he’s unordinary; he was born without emotion, which makes him unable to take out his emotions. It’s unfair, and he doesn’t like it.

 

Jaebeom is cursing under his breath until he realizes two shining and beautiful balls are thown inside his box, they are ‘happiness’ and ‘anticipation’. Jaebeom lifts his head and sees the person who threw it. It’s a man, he’s stunning and breath taking. The blond strands make him look even more beautiful, Jaebeom never saw someone this good looking.

 

The blonde man suddenly squats infront of him, setting his gaze with the black haired boy who is currently sitting, he gives him a small smile and Jaebeom swears he’s so fucking handsome.

 

“Is it okay if I ask you something?” The man voices out, smile still plastered on his mouth. Jaebeom nods and replies with a stutter, “Y- yes, what is it?” He wants the world to swallow him up when he knows he messed up his question. The man infront of him chuckles, maybe laughing at Jaebeom’s sudden reaction, soon he asks, “Why are you doing this?”  


“Doing what?”

 

“This, the donation box, you do realize that people will just give you all the negative emotions, right?”

 

Jaebeom’s eyes go back to the balls inside the box, stunned by the glimmering effect from it. He stares at the man again, “I was born without emotion.” He tells the truth, which causing the man to get surprised.

 

“Well, that’s interesting, tell me more about it?”

 

Jaebeom shrugs, “Sure, I don’t really mind, so, since I’m kinda different with most of you, once I gulp these balls of emotions, I can’t take them out, they’ll just stick with me forever.”

 

“How long have you been doing this?”

 

Jaebeom stays quiet for a while, forcing his brain to memorize it again, “One month.”

 

The man seems amazed, “Wow, and what emotions did you get?”

 

“If I’m not mistaken, ‘sadness’, ‘fear’, ‘anger’ and ‘disgust’.”

 

“Yikes, that must be hard living with those emotions in one month.”

 

Jaebeom lets out a forced and small laugh, “Yeah, I was suffering, how about you? Uh..”

 

“It’s Mark.” The man giggles, and Jaebeom repeats his question, “Okay, how about you, Mark? Why are you throwing these precious emotions away?”

 

Mark opens his mouth, “You’re cute and I just don’t want you to feel sad.” He ends his sentence with a wink while Jaebeom is cringing.

 

“Anyway, for me, I just broke up with my lover, and I feel like I don’t need these emotions anymore, so here you go.” Mark answers with a smile and Jaebeom’s heart stings at it.

 

“That- That’s not true!” Jaebeom stands up, eyebrows furrowing as he half yelling. It’s stupid, he doesn’t really know what’s the reason for him to stand up and raise his voice. On the other side, Mark looks like wasn’t expecting that, but he keeps calm. The latter only lifts his head, still squatting as he eyes Jaebeom who seems angry about it.

 

“You’re a normal human being and your emotions will grow again eventually if you face some incredible experiences!” The gap between Jaebeom’s eyebrows are decreasing, giving a hint that he’s not satisfied with what Mark said about him not needing the emotions.

 

Emotions are wonderful, Jaebeom only knows the negative emotions, but he’s sure, he’s very sure that ‘happiness’ is magnificent—he often sees his mom gets happy, the smile that she flashes everyday has a different vibe when the woman gets flooded by joy, Jaebeom found himself that he’s drowning in a pile of the same thousand questions; how does it feel when you’re happy? He tried to searched it, but he can’t understand, yet he knows one thing; happiness is such an astonishing emotion.

 

Jaebeom stutters when he realizes that he was almost-screaming at Mark—the man that he just knew several minutes earlier. He quickly covers his mouth and bows, “A- according to my research,  I’m sorry..”

 

“It’s alright, I’m just shocked that it looks like you know better than me.” Mark says as he stands up, making Jaebeom to gulp, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to lecture you..” Fear starts haunting him, his knees feel weak, Jaebeom’s mind is full with what will happen if he falls and making himself look like such a fucking loser infront of the man. He also gets anxious, what if Mark will lecture him back because he knows better than himself, Jaebeom can feel his eyes are getting glassy because of the excessive uneasiness as if his stomach is knotting.

 

Mark chuckles, “I already told you it’s alright, well now, since you’ve said something like that..” Jaebeom lifts one of his eyebrows, curious why Mark trails off and starts getting something from his wallet. Jaebeom is sweating, he just can’t stop the negative thoughts dominating his brain.

 

It turns out to be a name card. Jaebeom peers at Mark who is only showing off his bright smile—somehow Jaebeom thinks Mark is a scary person, it looks like this man is hiding tons of deadly secrets behind his smile. Once Jaebeom is back with the reality, he quickly shakes his head, trying to shove the thoughts away. His breath hitches when Marks pulls Jaebeom’s arm and whispers, “Will you help me bring those emotions back?”

 

Jaebeom gulps, the hot breath makes him shiver, did this man just ask him out? Jaebeom is confused, he doesn’t know anything about this. He’s back from his own thought as Mark tucks his name card in Jaebeom’s coat pocket. The blonde man tilts his head, eyeing at confused Jaebeom, “Text me if you’re willing to.”

 

And Mark leaves.

 

.

 

When Jaebeom gets back, he gulps the two emotions. He feels amazing, his heart overwhelms with pure joy, now he understands fully what Sungjin and the others meant. The feeling is truly can’t be described, it is something that you have to know by yourself. Jaebeom is smiling widely, cheeks flushed red because of the big pool of happiness formed inside him. Jaebeom is crying—crying because he’s too happy, it’s kind of unfair that he couldn’t feel this kind of emotion back then but that’s the past, he feels bubbly now.

 

The fact that Mark asked him earlier makes Jaebeom’s heart flutters, it’s so fucking amazing. He never felt something like this, his body feels like feather—too light, as if he can float at the sky with clouds surrounding near him. He grabs his phone, thousands of butterflies are invading his stomach—Jaebeom thinks his stomach is about to burst as anticipation is building inside him.

 

Jaebeom is thankful, he is really thankful to Mark, and he promises he will help Mark grow these emotions back with a small date.

 

Well, at least that is what Jaebeom texted to Mark.


End file.
